Greetings again Wardens- of Azeroth. Warden Tailglaive here again. A new year, but still the same old enemies it seems. At least for us, it seems like they come back every day. Thank Elune not everyone reappears every day, some disappear forever and just leave crystals. Minus the crystals, we could do with more people never showing their faces again. Anyway, let us get to your foes.
Interesting, more than one. Well, one is likely the boss, you should kill them. Trust me, imprisoning can seem like a good idea until self-righteous priests come along and undo your hard work. Bst bet, kill the second in command.
In fact, odds are, most of them are evil, best defeat them. If some aren't, just dump them on an island. What? You were looking for mercy from me? Forget it.
Now, how to beat them. Easy, get a boat. Or sink theirs. Yes, sink theirs. Ah, prisoners. Yes, I'm sure your morals won't allow hat. Best get yourselves a boat, board theirs, kick the Slavers overboard and upgrade your boat. Boats are useful, you never know when you'll need to expand your horizons and sail to new and uncharted lands.
As for rewards, we'll, how about some resources. You can use them to rebuild a boat.
A metal worgen? Yes, worgen were such a good idea to summon in the first place, why not add the second biggest menace of the Alliance in Gnomes to them and create some mechanical menace. Magic as well, well, this guy keeps getting worse and worse.
I'm sure whoever made him realises they've been an idiot, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try to put them down. As for Langstrom himself, just work out his weaknesses. He was in chains before, so clearly those work. Remember, not everyone has a priestess come long to free them.
And no matter what gnomes might say, metal does not fix everything, unless it's sharpened and put through your enemy's neck. That means he has to have lost some of the advantages to being a worgen, in exchange for his new extras.
Reward, let's go for gold. You can use that to finance your search for the real enemy, the one that creates metal worgen before they create something worse, like metal wardens.
Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2017 11:24 Post subject:
Excellently put together, Kari! A bitter-humour that I enjoy
Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2017 6:48 Post subject: WANTED: The Warden's Antagonists [OOC]
Greetings, I am Yalna Tailglaive, Warden. One of the originals, I was capturing fire giants and floating eyeballs when most of your little group hadn't even been born. You've likely come across the results of my job within the Wardens, the Wanted posters. Every six hours or so, I travel around, find some rare enemies that somehow have become more powerful, set up a poster, leave a reward, leave a note from Sira and carry on with my life.
Recently though, since that Illidan Moronrage somehow became popular, I've been banned from doing Wanted posters on the Broken Shore. Now he's on Argus and purely out of spite, he and his team of new buddies have taken over the job.
Now to the point. Seems there was a messup at the postal service, this is what you get when your post is done by small creatures. Anyway, your Wardens of Azeroth antagonists seems to have across my desk. So, because I'm bored and obviously so impressed that you are warding Azeroth so well it hasn't blown up yet - I'm digressing, I've come up with posters so you can show anyone that pops on by your hovel the enemies you are up against. I've got some spare rewards to I tend to just get from our nearest vendor.
Let's see...Rek'Zun. He's a troll. Funny, we used to call the moronic demon hunters that wouldn't stop talking about jokes no one found funny trolls. Off topic, but something I thought you might find interesting.
So, he wants to make a new troll empire. Empires never end well, name me one good empire? Nope, good. You're smart. Understandable you want to kill him. Stealing souls, yup, that sounds like a bloke worth killing. He still seems a bit different from most other trolls though. Most of the trolls I liked killing used to hide in buildings and get killed by five people. Then they got smart and hid in larger buildings and got killed by ten to twenty-five people. Maybe Rek'Zun has the right idea and not hiding in-
Oh, you killed him. Thanks. Oh.
So he has a daughter. Good, better kill her. She no doubt hates your guts. Maybe one day she'll hunt you down, lock you up, get locked up, kill you atop the Black Temple and someday you'll be revived. F- you Illidan Doucherage.
Right, Uri'Jin. Masks, better destroy masks. Masks are bad, helms are good. Remember that youngsters. Right, do I make her elite? Is she a tough foe. Maybe we'll find out when you-
Oh, you killed her. Thanks. For telling me. Quickly.
Oh well, maybe one day they'll come back. I once did a poster for a guy called Naz'ak and he took almost a year to come back. Since these trolls may take a while to come back, I'll reward you with gold. Afterall, gold is always useful, even when you head off to your next adventure.
So Kora'thil. He's a blood elf. I can see why he should die. Oh, he's undead. Yup, worth killing. A necromancer...anyone care to explain why this guy is still not dead?
So, he's a cult leader. Cults. Surely you have to be an idiot to join a cult. Though, you'd have to be an idiot to become a demon hunter and yet here we are. Anyway, he wants to gather lots of type of magic. Magic, why does everyone care so much about magic. Why aren't there any cults out there that are obessed with plate armour?
Well, better keep killing his commanders and eventually find him. Then kill him. Again. Keep killing him. Visit him on the first Tuesday of the month and kill him again. Undead necromancer blood elves that run cult and play with mind control magic are worth killing over and over again.
Right...reward. Well, seems you been fighting this guy for a while, so have some resources for your order. You're going to need it if you keep letting furry wolves take the lead, or even worse, dead knights.